The past week has been a whirlwind. I know many other people have been in this place. I know many more will be entering it as well. One moment you’re still chewing on it, the next moment you’ve completely broken down. There there are all the questions. I have found, in our 10 days journey (thus far) with Eli, that those start with “What if…” In the midst of it all you try to be optimistic; to be strong in the faith; to do all the things you know you ought to be doing: praying; seeking; fasting; connecting with God; etc.
But I have to admit in all of it, I never dreamed those words would be uttered or spoken to me: “Your son has cancer.” No matter who you are, where your’re from, or where in life you may find yourself – those are words you never prepare yourself for. How can you? Who would even factor it into the equation. For some, it may be a heart condition, or a rare illness, or an accident. It’s not always cancer. Angela and I are still in the process of accepting it, understanding it, and adapting to what comes with it. Decisions. Treatment. Options. More things to pray over, consider, and factor in than anyone can possibly imagine. First and foremost, of course, is Eli. Any parent would desire the best treatment available; the best facility; and the best medical staff. No matter the cost, no matter the location. Yet, real decisions have to be made and the full realm of each possibility is faced in reality. There is no “trial” lab when life is being lived out in each moment, and with each decision. May God truly direct our paths and may we consistently allow Him to! – is our prayer.
Instead of being lengthly, I just want to say it is life changing. In what ways? I don’t really know the full impact yet – we are still “in” the induction (as they call it). We would only ask for your prayers. And in advance, I will say we certainly appreciate them. Our hope is in Christ alone, knowing that all things are in His hands and heart. Thanks for reading my rambling. I hope in time I will make more sense.
Prayerfully, in Him,
Porter
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